All diets work. Why? Because our survival depends on food. The more interesting question is how each diet works, and if it works for the purpose you intend it to. Eating for pure pleasure, or emotional eating, almost every day, is something new to the times we live in.
Most of my clients admit that they are emotional eaters. It happens if they are irritated and there are always many irritants, internal (headaches, feeling tired, cramps, etc.) as well external (sounds, lighting, temperature, visual annoyances). Let’s say pain is a common one. If we break a bone or bruise our leg the injury is obvious and visible; the pain we experience is “real.” If we feel depressed this might show in our body language, (slouched shoulders, lowered head) but it is more of an attitude that we have. Sadness might show in the way we dress or pay attention to our hygiene. Although the true pain and the deeper symptoms are all but invisible to the eye.
Many people turn to food, a temporary relief of deep emotional depression or a long-term process of suppressing emotions that would have led to change: change to a new job, changing a relationship, changing the place where they live. To make any of these changes you have to face emotional pain and make an effort, do the work. Making a decision somehow moves us forward so we are no longer dwelling in the same irritation and hidden pain.
Delicious doesn’t exist. We’re attached to certain foods that soothe us, but these are habits from our past. For instance, the idea of eating an octopus is not very appetizing to me, but our friends surprised us with a beautiful dinner and the delicacy of octopus on a big platter. The question, “Anyone a tentacle?” made my stomach turn and twist. Jerzy would eat pierogis five times a day—they are his idea of delicious, but others would gladly turn them down. Delicious is subjective, but healthy is not. Healthy does exist as an absolute.
Sluggishness, lethargy, and depression are symptoms that a diet or eating pattern isn’t healthy. The body doesn’t lie; it expresses everything that’s inside us, emotionally and physically. Comfort foods seldom comfort in the end; instead, they perpetuate the bad feeling that caused the person to turn to them in the first place. They decrease immunity and disrupt hormonal balance. It all comes down to control – either food controls us or we control the food. Awareness of what we’re eating and how we’re eating it can break the cycle.
“Upgraded brain” millennials are coming to us in increasing numbers to learn a new, different kind of lifestyle. They’re looking for simplicity that they can afford; they don’t want to own machines or be tied to gym memberships. They adopt new behavior if it’s logical and practical.
We know that what we ask people to do in The Happy Body is to change. Not to fix, not to try and look for something that is hip now, but to embrace a permanent change to a new lifestyle that will work forever.
DEEPER CONTEMPLATION
What kind of diet are you on? Do you ever think of how daily habits can shape the course of your life?
Think of one thing that you can change today, and if you like, tell us what it is below.
I have started my change with a healthy breakfast, porridge with fruit and berries,brown soda bread with cream cheese and kiszony ogorek (Polish pickeled cucumber),
I find that changing one meal at a time is easier than changing the whole diet at once. It helps get used to certain foods easier and makes the change less sudden.
Pawel,
I think that your approach to make a small, permanent change in your diet is good. One thing at a time: from breakfast, to lunch to dinner. If you make some adjustments toward better way of eating the results will show up. Thank you for sharing!
Kindly,
Aniela
My body is definitely unhappy. I have been experiencing eczema since childhood, hives from chocolate (possibly linked to corn syrup), depression, increased anxiety as I age, tiredness, brain fog, and skin outbreaks. I use sweet and salty as my comfort go to’s. Chocolate, ice cream, nachos and sour cream. I am most at risk during dinner prep and after the kids are in bed. I really struggle saying no to myself. I am currently trying chewing gum during dinner prep to stop me from popping random stuff in my mouth. When I get stressed by the kids acting up I am prone to grabbing a handful of chocolate chips or something similar.
I have tried gluten free, the Master Cleanse, HIIT workouts (which worked until I stopped), juicing (which also worked until I stopped), + a number of random other ideals.
My ultimate struggle is putting together a meal plan that is easy to incorporate into my family meals. My husband is a bush worker who needs 3500 calories a day, and we are all conditioned to a diet high in dairy.
I have recently read the Happy Body and while I am intimidated by the 41lbs I need to lose (my goal was always to get down to about 135lbs/23%body fat), I am also pleased that I only have 4lbs of muscle to build. I am 5’5″ and I have been sitting at around 160lbs for the last year. I was previously hovered around 150lbs before going on an anti-depressant for a year. I gained 13lbs and 8% body fat over 4 months thanks to that experience and I can’t seem to shake it.
I would really like to be able to set a positive health example for my kids and feel strong and capable. I’m going to ask my husband to start the happy body program with me. He is already quite fit, but I think the Happy Body program would help him achieve the goals he has for himself quite successfully as well.
The first change I am going to make is to add more vegetables to our meals and find more creative ways to incorporate them beyond raw veggies and basic salads.
Hi Lila,
It was interesting the way you analyzed your attempts in getting your body to be happier /healthier. In between the lines you admitted that your consistency in following the new approach needs to be improved. One day at a time, from meal to meal – sticking with the plan will result in achieving a healthier and more attractive body.
The idea of incorporating more vegetables into your diet is a first step toward healthier, more alkaline environment for your organs to function more efficiently.
On the other note, I find that compering myself to others never works well and once I take responsibility for my own happiness, I feel in control and content, even with very small increments.
Keep us posted about your progress. Thank you Lila for joining the discussion.
Warmly,
Aniela
I have a healthy diet and I’m not overweight but my body fat is higher than I want it to be. Can you explain how the Happy Body program promotes fat loss and muscle increase? Does it require getting strong enough to live heavy weights?
Thanks in advance.
Luc,
Body fat is directly correlated to your diet – what kind of foods and volume, how much you eat. The excess will be stored as fat. Look into these two aspects if you want to decrease you body fat. Increasing muscle mass is about getting stronger, lifting heavier weights. That’s why we created in THB program six standards, to consider all aspects, and not to leave out anything. Good luck with pursuing your happier body.
Kindly,
Aniela
Dear Aniela,
What a great line! “If you eat, you are on a diet.” In this day and age people have such a complicated relationship with a mere word diet that it’s time to change it.
I have had food addiction problem since I was a kid, trying to run away from the domestic violence and to internalize my emotional pain. I never looked overweight so I could never seek help or complain… or stick with “diets”. I always overate.
So when I found The Happy Body program, I decided to do it differently. With the support of Kim, my happy body mentor, I decided to tackle one thing at a time so I promised myself to ONLY eat 5 times a day, every 3 hours. It was unbelievable how often I found my hand in a jar of nuts, or my nose peaking in the fridge. I couldn’t believe that if/when I didn’t have constraints, I would be/have been putting food in my mouth 10-15 times a day.
To make my struggle easier this time, I set my alarm for every time I had to eat and left any doubts and decision panic behind.
I was very successful. I ate too much for lunches and dinners but I was still proud of myself.
Next I tackled the food choices. I committed to avoiding all grains during lunch and dinner and again, even though I left the table too full, I was proud bevause I nailed my time and my food choice. And that was a big deal.
Until it wasn’t a big deal any more. So I tackled the amount of food I was consuming.
It is still work in progress but I am so so so much better than I have ever been.
And best of all, I know it is not a “diet”, it is a philosophy, it is rebellion against the system, it is revolution.
Dear Aniela,
What a great line! “If you eat, you are on a diet.” In this day and age people have such a complicated relationship with a mere word diet that it’s time to change it.
I have had food addiction problem since I was a kid, trying to run away from the domestic violence and to internalize my emotional pain. I never looked overweight so I could never seek help or complain… or stick with “diets”. I always overate.
So when I found The Happy Body program, I decided to do it differently. With the support of Kim, my happy body mentor, I decided to tackle one thing at a time so I promised myself to ONLY eat 5 times a day, every 3 hours. It was unbelievable how often I found my hand in a jar of nuts, or my nose peaking in the fridge. I couldn’t believe that if/when I didn’t have constraints, I would be/have been putting food in my mouth 10-15 times a day.
To make my struggle easier this time, I set my alarm for every time I had to eat and left any doubts and decision panic behind.
I was very successful. I ate too much for lunches and dinners but I was still proud of myself.
Next I tackled the food choices. I committed to avoiding all grains during lunch and dinner and again, even though I left the table too full, I was proud bevause I nailed my time and my food choice. And that was a big deal.
Until it wasn’t a big deal any more. So I tackled the amount of food I was consuming.
It is still work in progress but I am so so so much better than I have ever been.
And best of all, I know it is not a “diet”, it is a philosophy, it is rebellion against the system, it is revolution.
Olya,
I’m sorry (but glad) I just discovered your post. I really enjoy hearing about how Kim’s mentoring helps people to transition to better health and fitness, and, empowers them to achieve happier body with self-coaching. Your steps, and progression make sense. Congratulations to you!